I have a question about modification in my divorce decree? I will present the background as succinctly as possible. My question is this. Is this something that can be modified or am I wasting my time? Also, any possibility the courts will make my former husband reimburse my attorney fees?
I was married to a physician for 20 years. We had 4 children and I homeschooled them for 2 years and was a stay at home mom. When we went to court for our divorce he had a high powered attorney and I had an almost incompetent attorney. The trial started at 9am and continued, with lunch break, until 6pm. It not settled so the judge then told the attorneys to write up their argument or proposal and submit it within two weeks. My attorney did not submit his within a timely manner and the judge basically went with the entire proposal of my X's attorney. My former husband was awarded the house and basically everything else. The children and I have been living in rentals and it has been very difficult. My X lied about his income and thus I was not awarded the right amount of child support.

When the judge because of this the divorce my attorney didn't even let me know I was divorced. I found out almost a month later when my x told me. I tried to appeal the decision pro sea and wasn't able to do it because there is only a 30 day window to appeal.

I have a divorce decree that states my former husband is supposed to pay half of my children's medical bills and he has not done this. He was also supposed to pay for a tutor for my son last summer my son was supposed to go to summer school in order to be prepared for 6th grade. Since my son was spending the summer with his father he couldn't attend his county's summer school, so my husband was supposed to pay a tutor that would be comparable to his attending summer school. He did not do this and consequently he failed 6th grade. Now he is struggling again and my x won't pay half for a tutor.

Another problem is he has "shared parental responsibility" yet he hasn't seen his children in over 6 months, even though he lives only 6 miles away. He didn't call them on Thanksgiving or Christmas, and always tells them "no" if they ask him if they can come to his house or see him. Yet, I have to consult with him on ever thing I do with them regarding school decisions, medical decisions and so forth. He generally is disagreeable and won't work with me. It is like I am shackled to him on major and minor decisions, but he is not sharing in anything pertaining to his children or working with me on any level. The only time he exercise his "shared parental rights" is when I try to do something like get them braces and he says "no."

One of the stipulations in the divorce decree states that he was to sell the marital home to pay off all debts. He has not done this and was taken to court by two of the debtors he owes money and they tried to garnished his wages. So, because of this, he tried to reduce the child support and alimony. I had to pay over $1,000 in attorney fees to stop this move. He still lives comfortably in this 3,200 square foot home with a swimming pool and basketball court. My children and I are living in very modest rentals. He doesn't even allow the children to visit the home they were born in.

In addition to the above mentioned contempt there are a few other things he has ignored in the divorce decree. I need to take him back to court. I need to take him back for contempt and for a modification. I have a copy of the complete trial transcripts (huge file) and the divorce decree.

I understand from reading the Florida statues of divorce laws that my children are supposed to be living in some semblance of the means they were used to prior to the divorce. This is NOT the case. Once they attended private schools, owned horses, and had many other opportunities. I realize they cannot live like this, however, I have a hard time giving them extra money for school trips and the few extra things teenagers need.

Another thing I forgot to mention is that he is supposed to give me a copy of his income tax returns yearly. He has refused to do this too. He lied about his wages when we divorced and showed no proof of his income then. He was making almost $200,000.00 the year we divorced (2003) so I am sure his income is more now.